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My personal style signifier is a Kabbalah bracelet my mother bought me for my birthday a couple of years ago. It is engraved with the 72 names of God and is meant to protect the wearer. My mother told me that, if it breaks, it has served its purpose of protection. I was involved in a serious accident a while ago. Luckily, I came out unscathed. Less than two hours later, the bracelet broke. Since then I have never been anywhere without it.
The best gift I’ve given recently was a set of five frosted crystal Lalique deer from the Sotheby’s Freddie Mercury sale, to my husband for his birthday. Our surname, Ofer, means deer in Hebrew. In addition, the number five denotes protection. I was searching for something symbolic that he might cherish for many years to come; it felt meant to be. I really had to fight for it: it was an online auction with 48 other bids!
The place that means a lot to me is Black Rock Desert in Nevada where Burning Man festival is held every summer. I’ve only been twice, but it changed my life. My stepdaughter convinced us to go: her, my husband and my daughter Danielle. When we first landed there in 2018 it looked like Mad Max; you are disconnected from the world and everyone is free to express themselves as they wish. You realise how inundated you normally are with messages, WhatsApps, news alerts and emails. Whatever you wear, you’re not going to look strange or out of place. You live in the moment. In 2019, not only did we do Burning Man, but also a Burning Man-style vow renewal in Mykonos.
I have a collection of art. My grandfather loved Matisse so much, he named my father Matisse – not a typical Jewish name. I started to collect on a much larger scale when we inherited half of my late father-in-law’s collection – which includes works by Léger, Yves Klein and Miró – and my husband said, “You deal with it.” My view was to keep the masterpieces that represent the best of impressionist and modern art.
The last item of clothing I added to my wardrobe was a brown two-piece suit by Gabriela Hearst. I love the combination of looking utilitarian, professional and feminine at the same time. I also like to support entrepreneurial female fashion designers.
I am from a family of Holocaust survivors on my father’s side. That got me interested in artists who grew up in Germany after the war – I started with Polke and have since added works by the likes of Georg Baselitz, Günther Förg and Albert Oehlen. I love putting works in conversation with one another and seeing what new meaning can be derived.
The last thing I bought and loved was a work of art titled Une Valise by the artist and dear friend of mine Dor Guez, who is half Palestinian and half a Tunisian Jew. The photograph – an ode to his Tunisian grandmother – resonates with me as a descendant of Libyan Jews on my mother’s side. The picture depicts his grandmother’s suitcase from the ’50s, arranged in the shape of an animal skin splayed out on the floor. It reminded me of my Libyan grandmother and the experience she had in parallel with Dor’s grandmother – both of them were displaced from their home countries.
In my fridge you’ll always find a collection of cheeses, kefir, Greek yoghurt and whole milk. I consider these items to be necessities as well as luxuries. They remind me of home and my upbringing in Israel, where a traditional dinner consists of finely chopped salad with eggs and cheese.
The beauty staple I’m never without is Mac’s black or brown kohl eyeliner. Despite countless make-up artists telling me not to put eyeliner on the inner rims of my eyes, citing the fact that it makes them look smaller, I’m afraid I simply cannot do without it. It is not that I won’t leave the house without it – I won’t leave the bedroom.
I’ve recently discovered the Eight Sleep Pod, a smart mattress cover that monitors how many hours you’ve slept – also your breathing, and you can set the temperature. I’m a big dreamer, and my REM sleep is way above average. Eight Sleep Pod, from £2,545
The things I couldn’t do without are my contact lenses and thyroid medication.
The best book I’ve read in the past year is A Little Life by Hanya Yanagihara. Despite being heart-wrenching and at times difficult to read, this book has an ability to stay with the reader. At its core it is about trauma, endurance and the power of friendship. It’s worthwhile to be reminded of what is most important in life and how relationships with other humans are what get us through adversity. I’m a big believer in the power of art and fiction to make us think about things differently, and A Little Life left me feeling moved and emotionally raw.
The podcasts I’m listening to are Huberman Lab and Talk Art. Huberman Lab, hosted by neuroscientist Andrew Huberman, explores tools we can adopt for a healthier mindset. I particularly enjoyed the conversations around goal-setting, sleep, psychedelics, fear and stress. Talk Art is hosted by actor Russell Tovey and gallerist Robert Diament. As the name suggests, it’s dedicated to conversations with artists, gallerists and curators. It is educational and entertaining at the same time.
And the best gifts I’ve received are thank-you presents from children who’ve had their dreams granted by Make-A-Wish UK. I have two framed in my bedroom. One is a digital drawing by a 10-year-old named Isaac. The other is by a child named Lincoln, who depicted the happy face of someone having their wish granted. Both are very dear to me; I keep them next to a painting by Richard Prince.
The last music I downloaded was a playlist on Spotify by Bedouin. It’s put together by DJ and producer duo Tamer Malki and Rami Abousabe, and it feels like tuning in to your own personal Burning Man festival. When I work out in the gym, I put Keinemusik, an electronic music label, on full blast. I feel like I am 20 years old in a club.
An indulgence I would never forgo is Bamba, an Israeli peanut-butter flavour puffed snack that’s typically a treat for children. Because we expose kids to it early, there is a lot less chance of peanut allergies. I like to have a small pack every afternoon with my matcha. Whenever I have friends visiting from Israel, I ask them to bring me Bamba.
An object I would never part with is a floral dress with a black background that belonged to my sister, who passed away. I will always have it in memory of her.
My favourite room in my house is my dining room, where my family and I come together at the end of the day. Every Friday we have Shabbat dinners, mostly with friends and guests, but always with family. Even though I am not religious, Friday dinner is so important to me that my friends know I will never accept an invitation for that evening.
My favourite buildings are very historic: Burlington House and Burlington Gardens, which together comprise the Royal Academy of Arts – the only organisation in the world that simultaneously houses practising artists, leading academics and groundbreaking exhibitions. The building itself is an oasis of calm in the centre of London. I have chaired the summer party for the last three years, and last October I was thrilled to be selected as chair of the Royal Academy Trust.
My favourite app is Waking Up by Sam Harris, a meditation app that has helped me deal with stress, practise mindfulness and reflect on what I am grateful for. Compared with other meditation resources I have tried, this one is less dogmatic.
The best souvenir I’ve brought home is a pair of Mickey Mouse ears from an event organised by Make-A-Wish UK, the charity I support with a gala and auction every other year. It invited 240 families with children living with critical illnesses for a three-day Disney experience at the Hoar Cross Hall Hotel in Staffordshire. I met dozens of children and their families, and what struck me was the positivity, strength and optimism. They made me feel stronger and more resilient. The ears are a reminder of that.
My style icon is my daughter Danielle, who has the ability to put outfits together effortlessly. Her wardrobe is eclectic, and she also buys vintage and second-hand. She dressed me for my first date with my husband [Idan Ofer, owner of Eastern Pacific Shipping], when she was six! She is my go-to for all things fashion.
In another life, I would have been a psychologist. I am fascinated by human beings and what makes us the way we are. I love one-on-one meaningful conversations.
The best bit of advice I ever received was from a dear friend, Sir Nasser David Khalili, who told me about a quote attributed to Eleanor Roosevelt. It goes along the lines of “yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is a gift. That’s why we call it the present”. I love that outlook on life. It is about learning to live in the moment.
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